I am writing this neither to brag nor to prove anything but to strengthen something I have lived by and believed in wholeheartedly. For those who know me, and those who do not, this is not my ‘holier-than-thou’ rant. This is something I want the world to know. This is my voice for all the small things that make the world a better place, and us a little better person.
So when I reply to your messages with an extra smiley, I am not, I am not being too easy but just being very very kind. Because I believe in kindness that ranges from a smile to a mile or more.
When I meet you for the first time and seem too friendly. And you want to call it too needy, just know it is all about love. I don’t need anything from you when I say a gentle hello, or give you a smile, or return a hug or even exchange numbers. I don’t believe in doing good in expectations of return. There are enough people out there just befriending you for that reason, I have never been and will never be one of those. I will make you a friend to keep you in all walks of life. And if we happen to just know each other, I will still be one thing i.e. kind.
And when I stand for you, despite being bullied or bulldozed by your acts, knowing how much you hate me, don’t take me to be too weak. Nor was I trying to be simply good or come to terms with you, it was because I don’t like injustice prevailing. I am just someone who believes in speaking my mind for right no matter for whom. Know that if I do believe in something and you are on the same side of the line, we will be on it together!
If I message you 2am in the morning suddenly ‘coz something of your benefit crossed my head, don’t feel that I should just get a life. Well, in fact, this is what my life is about, being helpful no matter how insignificant.
The time I question the norms, the ones that are oppressive and offensive, don’t see me as arrogant. I have long heard that name, I am but a fighter.
And when I give my heart soul blood sweat whatever it takes to a job, I am not a nerd, not even workaholic. Maybe I am not even passionate, but really really dutiful, because we will still need such people to run the earth when robots take over. And I like to do it with my heart and soul, it fetches me some good night’s sleep!
I don’t congratulate either to just do it, I mean it when I say I am happy for you. I really am because I have learned to be happy for myself above all. You, you or you, none of your success, happiness bothers me or makes me insecure. I have learned to be thankful for whatever my small world has.
And know that when someone bullying you affected me, and I stood for you, I wasn’t being heroic. It is my take on something I had wanted someone to do for me once.
Or if you thought, me not questioning you stealing my work or calling you out in public, is what made me vulnerable, well I believed in your bigger image than that act. I believed also in second chances.
And when I do not respond to your meanness the same way, know that I am not foolish. I know every damn time you cross me, I am also not illusioned, all I try to do is not be you.
So when you see me do something, don’t you see me with glasses of bias, which all of us have so conveniently used that it is now a part of our vision. For once, put those glasses off and see me exactly for what I do. Good or Bad!
I am very very binary that way! There are no shades to me when it comes to goodness, either you are good or you simply aren’t.
I have believed in words making a difference, a smile making it easy for someone, a gesture changing the mood, a kind act being very uplifting. I am ready to see the world go berserk, go badass, go selfish. I still would like to heal it in my own little ways. You can call me names, I will still be the light people seek in darkness, a log for the drowning, that last train which takes you home, a little joy that comes from money in the pocket of an old jacket, that everything little and subtle.
Let’s just say this world should not become a place where being an influencer is easier than being kind!
A big cheer to everyone out there who think their acts of goodness go unnoticed!!